Everyone knows this for sure. You meet a nice man or woman and your body spontaneously starts acting crazy. You become restless and your heart starts beating faster. And that while you haven’t met at all. Is this love at first sight?
No. Unfortunately not. What you feel isn’t love, but chemistry. You know you’ve seen someone who might be interesting. The feelings that you experience (a faster beating heart, clammy hands and dilated pupils) are caused by the body releasing the hormone noradrenaline. There is a sexual attraction and you want to get to know the person in question. So it’s time for a date! I will come to that next time.
Now back to the chemistry itself. Attraction. A beauty of a word, don’t you think? I’ve read in an article that a one-dimensional “model” of attraction is always incomplete. It is not just money, not just the inside or the outside that counts, and so on and so forth. Fortunately, right?
The question is what is? Buggle up. Here it comes:
Inner is enormously important for one’s attraction. Is that person:
Attentive and kind? Does he do sweet things for you, or does he show that he has a big heart? Or is he blunt and downright unkind? Modest or in vain? Confident or depressed? Does he dare to make eye contact with you and show you that he wants to go for you?
Appearance. And not just a bit too. As you are reading this, dozens of scientists are conducting studies of appearance and appeal. And that’s not because nothing came out of earlier studies. No, there are a lot of research results that indicate that appearance is indeed important. Briefly summarized and generally speaking, your appearance cannot be ignored. But to pay only attention to that? That doesn’t help either. Because there are more things that play a role in how attractive you are found. Such as your social status. I’ve also read that people use the opinions of others to save themselves time. A bit blunt perhaps, but there is something in it. When we see that someone has many friends, we almost automatically assume that that person is cool.
And between the sexes we assume that a man or woman with many worshipers must have something very special. Do you remember in high school?
There was always that one boy that all the girls in the class wanted a kiss from.
Conversely, there was one girl whose little boys spontaneously got a red head if she just looked their way.
If you put such an attractive boy or girl in another class, the effect may suddenly be worked out. Because part of this is determined by popularity. If people see that others find you more attractive, then you also become more attractive in their eyes.
Your quality of life also counts. Suppose:
You know a man who is handsome and sweet. He also has a lot of friends.
But he usually sits on the couch all day. He watches a little TV, he drinks a beer. His friends come by and occasionally he goes to the hairdresser to have his perfect hair updated. And that’s all he does. Would you find that very attractive?
If you are like most women, you want a man who does something with his life. And men want that the other way around. They want that strong, independent woman who makes something of her life. Who does not shy away from doing new things. Who is fun to deal with, but who is also for experiencing adventures.
And then sexuality. This is something you shouldn’t underestimate.
Do you dare to let a man know that you like him?
Do you dare to flirt or behave sexually?
How you touch a man greatly influences whether he finds you attractive.
I have read a lot and have become a lot wiser. But the question remains for me:
If chemistry or attraction cannot of hardly be stopped? That it is a hormonal process in your body that creates an unstoppable urge to you. What does that mean? For us? When do you feel butterflies? When is that over and what if you are still crazy about the one, do you know that it is true love or does it come close to what we think is true love? What if the chemistry stays? And you can constantly and only think about when you see him or her again? Feel him or her, yeah, that especially? Those feelings really set you on fire, but really, ultimate insatiable desire and the sky is not the limit for us? Up to the moon and far far beyond. Desire for desire. To you, you, you.
I see you and kiss your lips and my tongue will naturally touch yours. How delicious we tongue. How you grab my ass, press me against you, your horney stiff cock, I feel you. That moment, yes, that moment exactly.
No matter how hard I try. I know, I wish, I believe:
I can’t compete with chemistry.
Impossible to beat.
It will always win.
All artwork by Puck Rietveld